Short List

I have this list of bands that I would love to see, but just haven't had a chance to do so. To be on my list the band must be either actively together, or on hiatus, no break-ups allowed. Every now and then I get to take one of those bands of the list for one of two reasons. Either I do get to see the band perform, as in the case of Air and Arcade Fire last week, or the band breaks up, as in the case of New Order last week.

According to a radio interview (and confirmed on his myspace page*) Peter Hook said last week that he and "Bernard [Sumner] aren't working together." This is terribly disappointing. New Order are one of my all time favorite bands. At least my list is shorter by three bands in one week.

More good news includes the fact that no one has been able to corroborate this statement. Maybe he's just talking out of his ass.

*Billboard article.

New Order live in New York 1981.

AIR, The Theatre @ MSG, NYC. 5/10/2007

Good week for “A” bands, first Arcade Fire, and now AIR. Like Arcade Fire, I had not seen AIR prior to last night. It was an excellent show. They had TV on the Radio open for them, which seemed odd. TVOTR (as I’ll abbreviate it), is very much a reggae rock band, which did not fit so well with AIR’s modernist interpretation of 70s electronica. I liked the guy’s voice, and that counts for something.

The show was part of the newly founded Highline Festival. The Highline was co-created by David Bowie, this years “curator.” From the press I’ve read there will be a different curator each year, and it is the curators job to chose the talent. In addition to AIR, Bowie has scheduled performances by Arcade Fire, Björk and Ricky Gervais, amongst others.

This concert was the first time I attended a show at the MSG Theatre, and I liked it. As awesome as old theatres are to look at, they are uncomfortable, hot, lacking concessions and feature inadequate restrooms. This theatre had none of those problems. Not only that, but I doubt there is a bad seat in the house; the whole place looks very well laid out.

On to the music.

I don’t know the names to many AIR songs. I know which songs I enjoy (most), and I could point them out if we were listening to a CD, otherwise I’m clueless. To fill in the gaps I’ll give a little background on AIR. AIR is an acronym for Amour, Imagination, Rêve, which translates to Love, Imagination, Dream. The band has two members, Jean-Benoît Dunckel and Nicolas Godin, each of whom are quite skilled on various instruments. Live Dunckel plays primarily keyboards and synths, while Godin plays guitar and bass. It is Godin’s bass playing that steals the show. His bass signal is processed and put through effects to make it sounds just as obtuse as Dunckel’s Moog.

Most of the songs played were drawn out beyond the length of their recorded counterparts, featuring both Dunckel and Godin improvising along with the rest of the band. They played for about 55 minutes before taking their encore break. They came back and played for another 15 minutes or so. The last song, whose title I do remember, was La Femme d'Argent which clocks in at around 7 minutes on the album Moon Safari came in at over 10 last night. The song was the highlight of the show, with Dunckel playing a very impressive synth solo. A majority of the songs played seem to have come from Moon Safari, which is interesting when you realize it was the groups first album, and they have released 4 more since then. One of my favorite parts of the show was that they played a set list for fans, not an LCD (least common denominator) set list that most bands will play. I was surprised by the fact that they played so few of the songs that you would thing of as being “hits,” not that they actually had any hits per se. It was a good surprise though. My one complaint was that $46 seemed a steep for a 75-minute concert (including encore break).

Arcade Fire: United Palace Theatre, NYC. 5/5/07

Monday night was not only the 1st time I’ve seen Arcade Fire, but it was the first time I’ve ventured into Harlem in at least a decade. There’s something I like about Harlem. It feels like a real city. I know it’s part of Manhattan, but it feels like another world when you compare it to the rest of the island. But, that’s not what I’m here to write about.

Opening for Arcade Fire was The National. I was attending the concert with my girlfriend and by the time we go to the venue (an amazing old theatre) we had missed the first song or two of their set. I had not heard of the band prior to the show, but I ended up enjoying the performance. I actually ended up picking up a copy of their last album, Alligator. That was the first time I’ve gone to a concert and purchased an album of an opened I’d never heard of prior to the show. With the new Björk album coming out on Tuesday I haven’t had a chance to listen to it yet. I’ll get to it. The band played about a 45-minute set, which was just right. The singer had a very Ian Curtis/ Paul Banks sound to his voice. It worked well with the music, which was your typical indie-rock offering.

Arcade Fire came on stage to what appeared to be a recording of a female preacher. The kind of preacher you don’t see up north, the kind that looks absolutely nuts on stage, running around and screaming and just giving Christians a bad name. I’m not pointing out denominations, but I think you get the picture. There was a whole religious theme to the stage, with a prop-organ, and some lit up bible silhouettes. It wouldn’t be a stretch to see the connection to Neon Bible.

Highlights of the show included:

No Cars Go: I absolutely love this song. I have the original Arcade Fire ep, and No Cars Go was easily my favorite song of that ep, or the first album. That fact they re-released it, and made it better just blows my mind. Live the song was even better than on record.

Ocean of Noise: I wasn’t crazy about this track as it was recorded on Neon Bible, but live this song really took off. With the tremolo on the guitar it had this great 50s/60s surf-guitar vibe to it.

The band ended the main set with: Keep The Car Running, (Antichrist Television Blues), Neighborhood #3 (Power Out), and Rebellion (Lies). It was amazing. They could have stopped right there. They didn’t need an encore. In fact there was no way for them to top it. They did come back with an encore, but it didn’t really live up to the last 4 songs played.

I really enjoyed the show. As I mentioned above I had not seem them before, although I had seen them on TV a few times, and was disappointed each time. The last four songs really did it for. I had terrible seats for this show. They were hands down the worst seats to any concert I’ve been to in probably 4 years. It didn’t really matter though. The band put on such a great show that I was up out of my seat doing my best not to dance (I must maintain my indie-credibility, and I would’ve embarrassed my gf). One last thing about the show. It was much easier to tell the weaker songs from the strong performed live. I think the new album is good, not as amazing as Funeral, but good enough to recommend to a friend. Of all the songs played from Funeral, they were spot on. They band had the energy, the crowd was providing more energy, they were just draw droppingly good songs. The songs from Neon Bible that were pretty good on record came out great live. But the songs that were a bit weaker, came across as flat. The band just didn’t have it for some of the songs. I don’t what happened. That’s it, here is a set list. Courtesy of Us Kids Know.


Black Mirror,
No Cars Go
Neighborhood #2 (Laika)
Haiti
Black Wave/Bad Vibration
Neon Bible
Windowsill
The Well And The Lighthouse
Ocean Of Noise
Keep The Car Running
(Antichrist Television Blues)
Neighborhood #3 (Power Out)
Rebellion (Lies)

Encore:
Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)
Intervention

I'll Say It Again.

I said it last year, and I'll say it again, Roger Clemens has no class. I'm not sure what was going through that block shaped head of his when he decided that playing for the Yankees was a good idea, but it sure as hell didn't have anything to do with his fans. I wish I knew what made this man tick. If he cared about something other than himself he would be playing for Boston Red Sox this season. Sure, the Sox don't actually need Clemens, but he would have been an excellent addition to the team. And it would have looked good to come back to the place he spent half of his career. I can't wait for his reaction when the Yanks miss the playoffs this year. I am ashamed to have been a fan of this man. He may be a great baseball player, but someone that shit on his fans the way "The Rocket" has, doesn't deserve to be looked up to by anyone. He is nothing more than another Aging Sell-Out.

I'm too disgusted to write anymore.

The Flaming Lips, Brown University, Providence RI: 4/21/07

Saturday The Flamings Lips played a show at Brown University, in Providence Rhode Island. Unlike some universities, Brown opened up tickets to the public, which is good if you got one. I didn't. My girlfriend had been in contact with the university for the last couple of weeks in an attempt to get us tickets, and we thought we would succeed. What we were told, was that more tickets would go on sale the morning of the show, and that we should get there early to purchase said tickets. What they didn't know was what time tickets would go on sale, and instructed us to contact them on Friday. Which we did, and they were already selling tickets. Apparently they decided to sell tickets a day early. They sold out Friday, a day I couldn't make it to Providence.

At this point my girlfriend and I were quite angry at being deceived out of tickets. But, being the go-getters we are, we decided to make our way to Brown on Saturday anyway, we were going to find a way into the concert. Which we did, go to Brown that is, we didn't get into the show. I didn't see anyone selling extra tickets, and security was tight enough to scare us off.

No Lips for us, but we did kick around Providence for a few hours. Up until Saturday I've never seen more of Providence than the highway to and from, and the inside of Lupo's. It's a nice city, I look forward to returning there June 6th for a Deftones concert. It's a Wednesday, but maybe I'll find a way to make a day of it.

In conclusion. Brown University sucks at keeping its word. Providence is a nice city. The Flamings Lips still rock.

TheGuinnessTooth in Germany

Today I received word that I, TheGuinnessTooth, will be moving to Germany for a 12 month stay. I'm not clear on all the details, but I'll be leaving either August 1st or September 1st, and I'll be in the German state of Baden-Württemberg. The purpose of the trip is to learn the German language, and I'll be studying at a German University.

I'll bring forth more details as I figure them out, but barring some sort of catastrophic financial meltdown I'll be reporting from southern Germany in about 4-5 months.

My Condolences.

In wake of this weeks shootings at Virginia Tech I would like to send my condolences to Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson. They have had the soap box ripped from under their feet. It's sad that this shooting had to happen so close to their opportunistic attack on Don Imus, they barely had time to make America hate him as much as they would have liked to. I know Heavy Metal and Video Games are to blame for this. If the shooter hadn't spent so much time listening to death metal and playing Grand Theft Auto, he never would have gone on the shooting rampage to begin with, and then Al & Jesse would still be tearing Imus a new one. I'm sure Al & Jesse are praying for the day when they can once again monopolize America's airwaves, and convince white people that they are in fact the devil.

It's a Girl.

A couple in Sweden recently named their baby daughter Metallica. As far as I know it is her middle name, but still Metallica as a name? I knew the Scandinavians were a bunch of hard rockers, but who wants to date a girl named Metallica? Best part of this story? This isn't the first baby named Metallica in Sweden. Although, to be fair the first baby Metallica was spelled, "Mettalica." Apparently by doubling the "T" and halving the "L" the name was more appropriate for this couple's child. To each their own.

Mew: Paradise Rock Club; Boston: 3/23/07

Friday night I drove up to check out Mew in Boston. I'd never been to the Paradise Rock Club before, and I hadn't heard Mew up until about a month ago, but it was a good idea to go. The opening act was a group called Oh No Oh My, which didn't sit well with me. I just don't trust a band with a name like that, so I showed up late. We only got to the show about 15 minutes before Mew went on stage.

A little background on Mew. They are a Danish band. Umm, thats all I've got. I know they have at least 2 albums to date, but odds are there are more. OK, I just checked wikipedia, and they do in fact have 4 albums. Their latest album in titled "And The Glass Handed Kites."

The show itself was quite entertaining, save for one fact; they weren't touring for "And The Glass Handed Kites" they were touring for their previous albums. Which was just released in the US. I have never heard of a band touring for an old album, even if it was re-released. One of the things I love about the latest album is the way most of the songs don't sound like individual tracks, but just parts of a longer song with various movements. Fortunately they replicated this during the show, for the most part. I would have preferred it had they played more songs for the latest album, but I made due with what I got. I don't know enough about the band to give you and sort of a setlist, so I'll leave it at that.

The band was an odd group of people. The singer looked tremendously like Mark Hammel in profile, which freaked me out. It was like watching Luke Skywalker sing some of my favorite new songs. The keyboardist is a Dr., but they don't say what he is a doctor of. He had long ringlets, and if anything at university has told, physic and chemistry grad students tend to have the awesome-est beards and hair, so I'm guessing it is one of those. The bassist had an odd condor like swaying to the way he played bass. His arms were spread wide, and he just swung back and forth. I couldn't see the drummer, the guitarists monitor was in my way, but the guitarist was the most normal looking dude in the band. Except for the fact that he looks straight out of the 80s, with his trainer mullet and baby mustache.

If you get a chance, check out the latest album, And the Glass Handed Kites.

Hip Hop Pirates

Who would've thought Hip Hop and Pirates would have gone so well together? I know I didn't.

Explosions in the Sky: Webster Hall, NYC 3/20/07

Sorry for the delay, I've been swamped with work, and laid up in bed.

This is the first time I've seen Explosions in the Sky. I wanted to get tickets for the show in Cambridge, MA on the 21st, but those surprisingly sold out before the NYC show. Who knows?

Anyway, they were supported by Eluvium and (one of the worst openers I've ever heard) The Paper Chase. Eluvium is one guy that loops various parts of a song over and over, until it sounds like there are 30 guys one stage playing in perfect harmony. The Paper Chase has an excellent rhythm section, but the singer should find a different line of work. He wasn't a bad singer, he just wasn't a good rock singer. The Paper Chase is a great name for the band, what with being the name of a Broadway show, because the singer sounds like he should be doing musicals and not rock shows. Both openers played about 45 minute sets, which was very appropriate for the evening. Regarding the rhythm section; the bassist was pretty bad-ass, playing lots of chorded parts as opposed the typical single note lines, not to mention the fact that he had one of the coolest beards this side of Mecca.

Explosions in the Sky took the stage around 10:15pm, and were a very gracious act. Before they even played the first song one of the guitarist was at the mic thanking the crowd. Then the band started what would be about 70 minutes of floor shaking instrumental deliciousness. I'd love to give you run down of which songs they played, but, the songs are instrumental, they all ran together and the show was 3 days ago, and I've more or less forgotten the songs played by now. Not that it really makes a difference, EITS are one of those bands that could play any selection of songs off of any of their albums and it would still be an amazing show.

In case you are not familiar with the band let me give you a little bit of back story. It is a four person group. There is a drummer and three guitarists. Although one of the guitarists does play bass occasionally. As mentioned above they are an instrumental band, and play some pretty fucking amazing songs. They're touring for their latest album, All Of a Sudden, I Miss Everyone.

I really have no complaints about this band. I was glad I brought earplugs to this show (it was my first time doing so). They were loud. I mean really loud. Like, labor inducing loud. Like, I may have gone sterile from excessive scrotal vibrations. Really really fucking loud. I didn't wear the plugs for the whole show, but the last 20-25 minutes I couldn't take it anymore. I'm going to another concert Friday night (Mew in Cambridge), and I wanted to be able to hear it. Unlike the last concert I went to where I complained about a lack of encores, I really didn't think an encore would have been appropriate for Explosions in the Sky. The entire show was like a single piece or music with multiple movements, and an encore would have broken things up to the point of not making any sense.

After the show, the same guitarist came back out to thank the crowd and apologize for not playing an encore, say that's just the way they do things. If you get a chance go see the band, they are definitely worth the price of admission.
Also, if you go, pick up a copy of The Rescue ep the disc only costs $10 at the show, but routinely sells for $50+ on eBay.

Sparta; 3/10/07 New Haven, CT: Toads Place.

Toads Place is about 20 minutes from my house so I decided to skip the 2 opening bands. I think they were Aloha and meagainstyou. I did end up seeing the last 3 songs from meagainstyou, and I enjoyed it. One cool thing about them was that the singer handed out oranges, bottles of juice and some French bread to the audience. I'm not exactly sure if that's the best way to win over new fans, but I know I was jealous of the guy that got the juice. On to Sparta:

I saw Sparta about 5 years ago on tour supporting their first album, Wiretap Scars. They headlined a 5 band bill, and the ticket was only $5. It was a 5 bands for $5 gimmick. I missed them twice on the Porcelain tour, but luckily I made it this weekend. There really isn't much to say about the show. Nothing really impressed me. They've made line-up changes since then, and their most recent album is pretty weak. Fortunately about half their set was songs from the first album. One thing that really annoyed was their lack of an encore. Both times I've seen them they have not played encores. The first time I assumed it was because 4 other bands had already played, but Saturday night they just walked off stage. If anyone reading this has seen them before, is it common for them to not play encores. Aside from the lack of an encore they didn't play "Cut Your Ribbon" which is arguably their biggest hit. I'm not the kind of music fan that gets down of bands for playing a variety of songs, but hell no encore and no hit, that's kinda weak for a band that's not too big. It was probably the least eventful concert I've been to in years. It felt about an hour long, which means one of two things. 1) They did an excellent job of entertaining us and made the time fly by or 2) they played a really short set and left me wanting more. I think it was #2.

Trying to save money sucks...

Especially when you buy music like I did this week. I don't normally go crazy like I did this week, but I ended up with 3 eps, 4 full lengths & one 7". Here's a quick run-down of what I picked up.

Arcade Fire - "Neon Bible" This is a winner. I got the "deluxe edition" which came with a couple of flip books to play around with. Because I hate the annoying contrived "behind the scenes" DVD's that usually come with "deluxe editions" the flip books really impressed me. And the music blew me away. Too many excellent tracks to listed 'em all.

Air - "Pocket Symphony" I'm not crazy about this album. It's not as pop oriented as their last few albums. It feels like a throw back to earlier Air albums. One thing I can't fault them for is having Jarvis Cocker sing on a track. If I could have any singers voice it would be his.

Darkel - "Darkel" This is Jean Benoit Dunkel's (of Air) solo project. This did sound like the last 3 Air albums. If given a choice or this album or the new Air album, pick this one instead. If I had bought it when it came out last year, I probably would have dropped it into my 10 Favorite List.

New Order - "BBC Radio 1 Live in Concert" a lala trade, but worth it. You really can't go wrong with New Order.

Pelican - "March into the Sea" It may only be a two song ep, but it is so good I can understand why someone would want to name their blog after it. It's like post-rock meets metal; Post-Metal?

Mum - "Dusk Log" I accidentally bought this. I thought it was something else. But, it is still excellent. Only complaint is that the disc is a 3" disc, not a 5", which means I can't play it in my car or on my PowerBook. I'll have to copy it in another computer, and then put the copy on my PB.

The Flaming Lips - "Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell" I love this. There are 3 really good remixes on here, as well as 4 new tracks. Being "Yoshimi" era Flaming Lips, the best remix is the T.P.S. remix of "Do You Realize???"

Mogwai/ Magoo - Split 7" : The 45's from 1998, and features Mogwai performing Black Sabbath's "Sweet Leaf," my all time favorite Sabbath track. I've never heard of Magoo, but their cover of "Black Sabbath" is pretty bad ass as well. My only complaint is the boys in Mogwai don't seem to take the singing very seriously.

Hopefully that'll hold me over for the time being. I don't think any new music comes out for at least a week or so. At which point I'll spend more money, and try and justify one way or another.

Respect.

I have got a whole 'nother level of respect for John Popper of Blues Traveler after today. He was busted in Washington state for driving a car 111mph, while in possession of marijuana, drug paraphernalia, and, get this, 4 rifles, 9 handguns, a switchblade, a Taser and nigh vision goggles. Lets not forget the fact that his Mercedes has been tricked out with police lights, a siren and PA system.















I don't know what it is, but something about a formerly-obese-washed-up-90s-rock-star behaving in the above mentioned manner is absolutely the most rock n' roll thing I've heard it years.


Have we got ourselves another Nuge?

Thank You Hollywood!

I really don't care about the Academy Awards. I don't need someone to tell what is a good movie and what isn't a good movie. Just like I don't need the Grammys, well actually I might as well use the Grammys as a way to know what to avoid. God knows how bad the Grammys are at picking decent music. I digress. The Oscars were a total farce for one reason to me this year. Best Original Score went to Babel??? I hope someone that reads this blog has seen Babel, and will agree with me that it was a terrible film. Ok, maybe not as bad as The Fountain, but still pretty awful. The Fountain might be the worst movie I've actually paid to see, but it had the greatest Original Score I've ever heard. I'm sure there are other scores that are equally compelling, such as Zidane, un portrait du 21e siècle, or Hlemmur, but I've yet to hear the first of those two.

Back to Babel. The part of the movie in So Cal and Mexico was good, but probably only because my favorite Mexican actor was featured, Gael Garcia Bernal. The rest of the movie was almost as pretentious as The Fountain. It was as if Brad Pitt wanted nothing more than to make the worst movie of his career. I know he's a great actor, but he should stick to what he does best...Kicking Ass. Come ON. How about another Fight Club, or another Guy Ritchie film, even a sequel to Mr. & Mrs. Smith would've been better than Babel.

The score to The Fountain, wasn't even nominated. Clint Mansel did an amazing job composing the score, and Mogwai with The Kronos Quartet did an even amazinger job of performing the score. I was really tempted to put the score on "My 10 Favorite Albums of 2006" list, but it missed the cut by one spot. However, if I were to make the list today I think it would make the top ten.

Arcade Fire Tonight on SNL.

Hey, I know SNL has been a bit week this season but don't miss tonight. Rainn Wilson from The Office will be on, as well as Arcade Fire. Hopefully Arcade Fire will only play 1 new song, and 1 old. I'd rather not hear too much of the new album before it comes out.

The Ruraw Juraw

30 Rock references aside, I had Jury Duty this morning. I've been dreading this for weeks, just the thought of not only being awake at 8am, but having to be dressed and in a court by that time made me sick. I went though, it is my civic duty to convict or not convict people. I even got all dressed up for the occasion. My father's a lawyer, and whenever he goes to court he wears a suit, when he doesn't go to court he looks like the poorest lawyer in CT. This was reason enough for me to get dressed up, if it's important enough Padre Fleece to wear a suit, I should at least wear a tie. Which I did, in conjuncting with a pair of shoes my friend called "Homo Black Man Shoes," and he's gay so he must know what he's talking about. Anyway the shoes are killing my feet.

So I drove down to the great city of New Haven, home of both the hamburger and George W. Bush, and went about my business. I didn't read any of the information they sent, so I brought along a book, my iPod and something to drink. As it turns out I was not allowed to bring in my iPod or my drink, yet I could buy a drink at the "snack bar" only 8 feet from the metal detector. Apparently their beverage policy is based upon that of a music venue's. So, I went through security, took the elevator upstaits, checked in, told them I was a student, and left. Apparently telling them you are a student is a get out of Jury Duty free pass. All in all I spent more time in the shower this morning than I did at Jury Duty. I was even able to make to my 9:35 class on 20th Century African Politics with time to spare.

I do have to go though. I'm scheduled to serve again towards the end of July. However, if things go as planned I won't be around starting in mid-August, which means they'll have to postpone me again.

You know what they say about jurors; Do you really want to be tried by people that were too stupid to get out of jury duty?

Updates

If you haven't noticed, or are new here, I've changed the layout of the blog. Unfortunately in doing so I lost nearly all my information. I'm hoping to take some time to put everything back together this week, and then I'd like to start up dating my blog more frequently. What I'll be discussing could see a dramatic change as well. No promises here, but I should be kicking things up a notch pretty soon.

If You Don't Know Me By Now!

With the recent conclusion of season two of Extras I thought I'd treat you with some David Brent music video action.

Dekotora

If this doesn't make you want to move to Japan and drive trucks, nothing will.

Fools. All of them foolish fools.

Apparently Boston authorities are pissed off about looking like total retards (I apologize to any actual retards for being lumped in with these shit-for-brains city officials). If you haven't seen it on the news yet, let me fill you in. The Adult Swim tv show, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, was engaged in some guerrilla (don't worry it's nothing sinister) advertising campaign across the county. Part of this campaign was the installation of Lite-Brites (I love me some Lite-Brite action), in the shape of one of the show's recurring characters, around 10 different US cities.

Example:

As it seems that little Lite Brite, looks like a bomb to many people in Boston. In fact, one Boston official called the Lite Brite "sinister" looking. It's not often that governments wasting money on foolish mistakes offends, or angers me like this. BUT, the fact that they want to be reimbursed for their mistake, AND file criminal charges against the people that did this is just over the top. At this point they are just looking for a way to look less retarded (once again, sorry). They just need to let it go and admit they over reacted. In fact if anyone should be paying for this is, its the people who thought it was a bomb. I'm sure old people will disagree with me, but then again you probably belong in a nursing home.

Edit: I almost forgot to mention one of the best parts of the entire story. The two guys that were arrested, when asked about what had happened, would only answer question about haircuts in the '70s. I've got to get a transcript.

A Birthday Treat

As today is my birthday I'm going to treat myself to some Wesley Willis. How about a little "Rock & Roll McDonald's." Live no less.

Happy Birthday Elvis

Happy 71st Birthday King.

Lost in the Woods.

This past Christmas I got a GPS unit so I could partake in Geocaching. If you're too lazy to click the link to find out what Geocaching is, I'll tell you. You go to a web site, like the one above, you find a cache in you area, get the coordinates, input the coordinates into you GPS unit, and then find those coordinates. When you find the location you are headed out for, you look around until you can find the cache. It may be an ammo can, a plastic container, a film canister, you get the idea. In this container will typically be a log for you to write your name and the time of your find, also there may be some sort of goodies that you can take, and replace with something you brought along.

Now to my story. During Saturday's 70 degree weather I set out at a local park to find a cache with my girlfriend. The cache was on the back side of a ridge, which means I could have gone either way around it. After some debate and an excursion in the wrong direction we found the best path to the cache. This cache took me way out of the way from the populous part of the part. About 500 feet from the cache my girlfriend told me she didn't want to go on, so she was going to have a nice sit while I bushwacked it to the cache. After going off the trail to find the coordinates, I went back to find my girlfriend when I couldn't find the cache. Problem. She was gone. This was a little after 4:00pm, and sunset was 4:36, and we were about an hour from the trail-head. I needed to find her, and fast. I went up and down the trail for about ten minutes yelling her name. After I couldn't find her, I called 911, thinking I need help finding her if it was going to be dark soon. I had them on the phone for about 20 minutes, they were on their way to the park when my girlfriend showed up. I was freaking out before I found her. She is originally from Atlanta, and I was dreading the call to her mother telling that her daughter had disappeared into the wilderness. Apparently she had sat down for a few minutes, and then went to find me, but because I had left the trail to find the cache she hiked right on past where I was. From what she told me she was down in a dark part of the woods. I felt bad for leaving her behind, but I had faith in her ability to fend for herself (she watches enough Survivor Man). Anyway, that was my big scare for the weekend. One thing I know is that I won't be getting separated in the woods again.

My 10 Favorite Albums of 2006

2006 has come to an end which means it is time to run down what I liked and disliked this year in music. Today I’m going to grace you with my top ten favorite albums of 2006. Tomorrow, or the next day I’d like to list the most disappointing album for the year, and well as some other favorites from the year. Lets count down from 10.



10. How Strange, Innocence
Explosions in the Sky –
Putting this album on my list was a bit of a tormentor for me. The version of this album that is currently in my possession was in fact released this year, but it is a re-issue. The music on this album is 6 years old, but because it was never officially released I decided to list it. Why I like this album: It’s Explosions in the Sky, how do you not like this band? The songs are so well crafted in the way they grow, climax and then die. EITS are a band that knows how to do instrumental music well. Instrumental music as a whole will be a big part of this list. Including this album, 4 of the 10 have either no lyrics or very limited lyrics.
Standout Tracks: “Glittering Blackness” “A Song for our Fathers”



9. Palmless Prayer/ Mass Murder Refrain
MONO & World’s End Girlfriend –
As I just mention instrumental music meant a lot to me this year, and this was one of the year’s best. The album as a whole starts off very subdued and sounds like it could be a movie score. It isn’t until about half way through the third track that you notice MONO’s presence, and after that it is only again on the fifth and final track that you notice them again. The fifth track (no titles; all songs are names Trailer 1-5) however is one of the most beautiful tracks MONO has ever contributed. That one track is better than anything of their latest album. World’s End Girlfriend isn’t any slouch either. You can hear his (WEG is one guy) influence on MONO, the music is much more somber than previous MONO solo outings.
Standout Tracks: “Trailer 3” “Trailer 5”



8. First Impression of Earth
The Strokes –
I’ve got a feeling this is an album that will be left off many lists this year, if for no other reasons than the fact it was released so early in the year. The album came out a year ago tomorrow (January 3) in the US, but was actually released in 2005 in a few countries. I didn’t forget about it though. I think this album is excellent. After I heard the first Strokes album I told anyone that would listen “this band won’t last, they have one sound.” I was wrong. The band has completely reinvented themselves for this album. This album sounds less like the second album, than the second album sounded like the first. There have always been guitar solos in Strokes’ songs, but never like this, the band sounds like a real rock band, not some one hit garage group. Everyone in the band plays, and sounds, better than they did on any previous album. You may prefer the lo-fi sound of their earlier albums, but this is my favorite Strokes album.
Standout Tracks: “Ask me Anything” “Ize of the World”



7. Up Close and Personal* & Adventures in the Underground Journey to the Stars**
South
“Adventures…” is a studio album, and “Up Close…” is a compilation of tracks from the bands first three albums (including “Adventures”), live tracks and unreleased tracks. Both albums came out this year, and I don’t see one as being better than the other, but I couldn’t justify giving them two spots on the list. “Adventures…” is a great album, obviously one of my favorites from this year, but compared to the bands last album, “With The Tides,” this album is a giant turd. WTT is one of the best (and least appreciated) albums of the last 10 years, which will most likely make any future release by this band look weak in comparison. The studio album is too polished, and sounds like an attempt to keep up with Coldplay, Doves or Elbow … 4 years ago. “Up Close & Personal” features the band striped down and playing mostly live songs. The songs that I was forced to skip on the studio album, shine and demand to be repeated when performed live. Not only that, but perhaps the best New Order cover I’ve ever heard is included. Not only that, but as an added bonus a live DVD is included.
Standout Tracks: “Bizarre Love Triangle*” “Keep Close*” “A Place in Displacement**” “What Holds Us**”



6. St. Elsewhere
Gnarls Barkley –
If you haven’t heard at least one track of this album, you must be living in a cave, or maybe you’re deaf, in which case hopefully you’ve seen a video or two. “Crazy” was without a doubt the top 40 song of the summer, if not year, but there is more to this album than that one song. I bought this CD on a whim, aside from “No Way Out” by Puff Daddy & the Family, this is my first R&B or rap album, but it’s not. I was expecting an R&B album, but I got something much more diverse. There are a lot of guitar and bass driven rock songs. Not only is this one of my favorite albums of the year, but also this is one of the best rock albums of the year. I think the best part of this album is the oddball subject matter for the songs. This album features songs about the pleasures of Necrophilia and Feng Shui. I bought this album thinking I’d regret it, but the only thing I regret about this album is that I didn’t buy it sooner. PS: The last minute or so of the song “Just a Thought” is probably my favorite 60 seconds of music this year.
Standout Tracks: “Necromancer” “ Storm Coming” “Gone Daddy Gone” Transformer”



5. At War With the Mystics
The Flaming Lips –
The world’s greatest one hit wonder strikes again. Overall this album is weak by Flaming Lips standards, but is nonetheless a solid album. If I had purchased this album and the first two tracks had been left off, this album would probably be 2 spots higher on my list. I really don’t know what to say about this album. You either get The Flaming Lips, or you don’t. This album is on par with their last three albums, which were both awe inspiringly good. Steven Drozd sings lead vocals for the first time on a track off this album, “Pompeii Am Gotterdammerung.” This album also features what may be my all time favorite Flaming Lips song, “Mr. Ambulance Drive.”
Standout Tracks: “The Wizard Turns On…” “The W.A.N.D.”



4. Just Like the Fambly Cat
Grandaddy –
As you probably know this is the bands swan song. There is no more Grandaddy. That doesn’t mean you won’t be hearing their music anymore, it just won’t be by a band called Grandaddy. In case you didn’t know, Grandaddy is the creative offspring of one guy, Jason Lytle. Yes there are other band members, but Grandaddy is Jason Lytle. This album would end up on my list for no other reason than the fact it has my favorite album cover of the year. I’m not sure what it is supposed to mean or signify, but I like it. The music is typical Grandaddy. Odd and irreverent. The music is solid, and the lyrics are zany. In a previous post I paid my respects to Logan Whitehurst, a man who would have been the perfect opening act for Grandaddy. Sadly that will never happen. This is one of those albums that I just like, and I can’t really explain why that is.
Standout Tracks: “This Is How it Always Starts/ Shangri La [outro]” “Skateboarding Saves me Twice”



3. You Are There
MONO --
This album is amazing. Every year I make a list like this (this is the first year I’ve posted it online, however), and what I notice is that there is always an album of two that stick with me year after year, and this will be one of those albums. MONO is unique is the way they keep getting better. Yes, I know bands don’t always come out of the gate strong and then fizzle, but MONO came out of nowhere to blow us away, and then has repeated that feat again and again. I love every track on this album. Like EITS, MONO knows how to do instrumental, so well in fact they are probably the best instrumental band touring today. Up until about a month ago I would have told you this was the best album of the year, you see who changed my mind in a minute. The band truly explodes with this album. The band plays faster, slower, louder and quieter than ever before. If asked my favorite type of music I will say instrumental because of this band. There were other instrumental acts (GY!BE) that I enjoyed before I ever heard of MONO, but none of them pulled at me emotionally like MONO does. The members of MONO say more to me with pure music than any other musician could ever say with lyrics. The music is uncluttered and pure. There is no pretense, there is no wit, there is nothing but music stripped to its core.
Standout Tracks: “The Flames Beyond the Cold Mountain” “A Heart has asked for the Pleasure” “Yearning” “Are You There?” “The Remains of the Day” “Moonlight” (all of them)



2. Saturday Night Wrist
Deftones –
My second favorite album cover of the year, and my second favorite Deftones album cover, the self titled was absolutely bitchin’. The Deftones hold themselves to a higher standard than most. They don’t settle for anything but the best, and that is what they produce. Their last three albums are the three best metal albums this century. While recording this album the band repeatedly stated this would be their heaviest album ever, which it is not. In fact it is probably the least heavy album they’ve put out, and I love it for that. I cannot stand the bands first two albums; they’re un-listenable because they’re too heavy (a sentiment I know will turn many a Deftones fan against me). This albums is more in line with White Pony than anything else they’ve done. My definition of a bad Deftones song is any song in which Chino decides it in necessary for him to scream the lyrics, by that standard this should be the bands best album. I think there might be 2 songs where Chino pulls that nu-metal crap on us, but it doesn’t suck on this album. I went back and listened to the last two albums, and yes I still hate when he screams on those albums, but it works this time. Do I want him to do more of it? No. Am I going to skip the tracks? No. The biggest problem I have with this album is the song “Pink Cellphone.” It isn’t really a song. Sure there is a beat and a melody, but there isn’t anything that would make it something you could listen to more than once or twice. It’d like the Radiohead track “Fitter Happier” but with the worst lyrics ever and an annoying hip hop beat. This isn’t only the worst Deftones song ever, but might be one of the worst songs I’ve ever heard. If you don’t believe me go look up the lyrics on line and read the last verse aloud. Aside from that, it is an excellent album. It’s the first Deftones album I’ve tried to get non-metal fans to listen too.
Standout Tracks: “Cherry Waves” “Mein” “Xerces”



1. Mr. Beast
Mogwai –
I saw this band open for The Cure a little over two years ago. I’m pretty sure they had just put out “Happy Songs For Happy People” and I thought to myself that this is a band that is jaw dropping live, but sucks in the studio. This album changed that for me. This is Mogwai’s best album. This is the album I wanted the band to make that day I saw them. There isn’t a track to complain about on this album. It is solid from end to end. My problem with the bands earlier releases is they were too wussy. There was no meat to them. The were more ambient than instrumental (this is an album I’d consider instrumental even though there are vocals on a couple of tracks). This album is heavy even when it isn’t being loud. There is gravity to the songs. The vocals add an excellent touch. It is the vocals that are probably the biggest improvement on this album. You can finally understand Stuart Braithewaite (or is it Barry Burns?). His voice is clear and deep. When he’s sung in the past I couldn’t tell if it was English, gibberish or perhaps Gaelic he was using, but now I can not only tell it is English, but I can decipher the actual words being used. I didn’t want to buy this album originally. I’d been burnt by previous Mogwai releases, disappointed with each one, but this one is different. I don’t care that I bought it 6 months after it came out, I still love the album. I’m just glad I bought it in time to put it on this list. I’m done typing, time to go listen to this album,
Standout Tracks: “Friend of the Night” “Folk Death 95”

In Memorium.

I read somewhere that more people die on or around Christmas than any other day of the year. Whether or not this is true, I do not know. But, I do know two very important historical figures died this year on or around Christmas, but more important, to me at least, a great musician (that's not James Brown) died only a few weeks prior to Christmas. His name was Logan Whitehurst, he was 29, and he died due to complications from brain cancer. You've probably never heard of Logan, and if you have it is probably because of his amazing work as the drummer for The Velvet Teen. However, he was much more than a drummer, his solo albums were amazing, and his last one was released the day after Christmas. It is titled Very Tiny Songs, and contains 81 tracks. If you listen to Dr. Demento, you've probably heard some of his work.

I met him once. I think it was September or October of 2003, and his band, The Velvet Teen, had just played at The Middle East, in Cambridge Mass. He was a really nice guy. The other two band members were all dark and moody, but Logan was as bright as a spring morning. I've never spoken to a musician that was more enthused to talk to his fans. I told him how I totaled my car because of him. I was driving up to the Tweeter Center in Mansfield Ma, to see Radiohead, and listening to his album while doing so. It had rained earlier and we were in stop and go traffic, but I was so into his song Robot Cat (while writing this blog entry I had my iTunes on shuffle, and out of some 5,000 songs, this one came on when I was about to post), that I failed to notice the person in front of me had stopped, and my car slid right under hers. He found the story to be rather amusing, and in jest he offered me compensation.

It wasn't long after that performance that he had to leave the band. He came down with a mysterious illness, and was barely able to finish recording the album Elysium. The album turned out to be epic in every way, it was, without a doubt, the best album of 2004. I have never heard anything like this album either before or after. Unfortunately, he was not able to tour for the album, and they brought in some hack to replace him. It was his cancer that stopped him. He didn't stop being a musician though. After he felt as if he had his cancer under control he went to work on the above mentioned Very Tiny Songs album. I wrote Logan an e-mail this past autumn. He had posted on his MySpace blog that he had beaten cancer, and then it had come back, and then he had beaten it again (or at least that's how I interpreted it, it can be hard to understand what Logan writes), but in late August his doctor told him he would die within the year. I had hoped to hear from him before this happened, but it never happened. I told him how much I loved his music, and that he was a really nice guy the one time we met. I told him how much I was looking forward to his next album. I don't hold it against him that he never got back to me, he was dying from cancer and probably had more important things to do, I know I would.

On December 3rd of this year, 2006, Logan Whitehurst died from brain cancer. He will be missed.


Logan & Vanilla the Plastic Snowman!!

Here is an excellent essay Logan wrote on how to be cool. How to be Cool.

Santa Tracker

It's Christmas somewhere. Right now it's still Christmas Eve here on the east coast, but you can still track Santa. Thanks to NORAD you can see where Santa's been and where he is now. Go check it out.

NORAD's Santa Tracker

None of your Business

Not that it's any of you business, but I thought I'd share anyway. Yesterday, after I had made the post about EnglishRussia, I was heading to school to meet with some friends to study for today's exams. After I pumped some gas on the way there I experienced the most painful thing I've ever felt. The left side of my chest hurt like I was being stabbed. The pain was so bad it almost knocked me off my feet, I went weak in the knees. It felt like someone giving me a purple-nurple from the inside out. I ended up having a couple of these little outbursts of pain over the next 10-15 minutes. So I decided I should go to the hospital, something I normally wouldn't do. I'm not a fan of hospitals, I feel weak if I ever have to visit them. It's the same reason I don't take anything for headaches. In fact this was my first visit to a hospital, as a patient, since I bit the tip off my tongue as a 5 or 6 year old, so over 15 years. At the hospital they gave me an electro cardiogram, and some chest x-rays, but they didn't see anything. According to them there's nothing wrong with me. I just hope they're right, I'd hate to drop dead Christmas morning.

The highlight of the day were the people I shared a room with. There was the old couple, Daisy and her husband. Daisy had fallen a few days ago, but because of her alzheimers she has no recollection of it, or why she's at the hospital; then there was the ghetto lesbians, the manly one had been bitten by a spider on her stomach and was in severe pain. Her crying was only interrupted by the occasional scream, making out with her girlfriend or telling the nurse she was "in FUCKING pain." The whole this was wonderful to listen to. The old man kept having to hold Daisy down so she wouldn't fall out of this bed too. And the ghetto lesbians kept yelling at the nurses and doctors. Here's an example of one of their conversations:

Ghetto Lesbo 1 (the one in pain): (in a strong masculine tone) AHHHHH, I'm in FUCKING pain, it huuuurrttss!!!!
Ghetto Lesbo 2: It'll be ok baby
Creepy old Doctor: We don't need any of that in this hospital.
GL2: What??
GL1: (in mousy tone) It was my mouth.

And they more or less repeated that exchange with 2 or 3 doctors and at least 3 nurses.

Aside from the excruciating chest pain it was a good day.

Finals.

Sorry for a lack of updates, but it is finals time. I'll be done tomorrow around 7pm.

In the mean time check out: EnglishRussia.com

It is full of Russian (and former Soviet) real life humor.

Here is a sample of whats to come:

Describing Kazakhstan: "Real people of Kazakhstan don’t look like Sasha Baron Cohen, but more like Jacky Chan."

Or how about this wonderful music video from Kazakhstan. If you ever wondered what rap would sound like coming out of Central Asia, you now have an answer.



You could spend all day exploring the site. Most of it is in broken English, but you can figure it out. Anyway, back to school work.

Hear No Evil Smell No Evil.

Recently Gallaudet University has been in the news as they try to replace the president of their university. In case you didn't know it, Gallaudet is the nations premiere university for the deaf. After hearing more than one story about Gallaudet on NPR, combined with a particular meal at a local Irish pub/ restaurant, it got me thinking. When you are surrounded by nothing but fellow deaf people, can you fart with impunity? I know they are going to smell it, and perhaps they may even notice you squirm as you try to hold it in, but are they going to know it if you just casually let one rip? There is no way to narrow in on a culprit.

Your Weekly Moment of Zen #9

Apparently if you're a fruitty Arab dude it's difficult to express yourself. You can't wear a dress, even the straight dudes wear those. You can't get married, most marriages in the middle east are arrainged marriages, and it's tough to tell whose a gay when you're pairing off newborns. I got it, you can be a figure skater. But, wait there is no ice. Nevermind, just improvise like these "dudes."



BTW: Don't you wish we had roads that smooth in the US?

Well I Missed It.

The past three nights Ryan Adams & The Cardinals were playing at Town Hall in NYC, and I missed each and every show. It was a small venue, and they promised not to repeat songs. I read last week that they expected to play between 70-80 songs over the span of three nights. Eighty songs? I've seen Sigur Ros 6 times, they've been around over 10 years, and I don't think they've 80 different songs over the course of their career. It is times like this that I wish I lived in NYC, and could figure out Ryan Adams' web site better. You should check it out, it's a bit schizophrenic, Ryan-Adams.com. I don't know if he has a mailing list or not, and the way he just seems to play one off shows when ever he pleases I don't know if I'll ever get to see him live. I haven't yet pulled myself to check the set lists for the last three nights. I haven't been to a concert in so damn long, I haven't been in the mood to travel to Boston or NYC, and the only shows in CT have been crap. I'm going to try and see Explosions in the Sky in Boston in February, and I'll try to catch MONO in Boston in April and NYC in May. I saw MONO in the spring of 2005 at an American Legion Hall here in Wallingford, and it was crazy loud. The venue, if you can call it that, was just a big room, it wasn't even that big. I was about the size of the living room and kitchen combined at my old house. I think there may have been 40 people there. After that show, I'll keep on seeing them till that make me go deaf, because they are oh so loud. Now I'm rambling, Goodnight, or Goodmorning.

The Fountain

I went to see this movie Friday night. I had heard rather mixed reviews about the movie itself. Every professional reviewer completely panned, more or less shit on film. Every individual I encountered that had seen it praised the film. I got the theatre as the previews were about to start, and was afraid I wasn't going to get a good seat. Before going in, I talked to the ticket taker guy (I guess you'd call him an usher), and he told me the last time they showed the movie, 8 out of 10 people left early. Not a good sign. Finally the girlfriend finishes in the bathroom, and I hurry in to get a seat. Whoa. We were alone in the theatre, and it stayed that way. Never before have I been to a movie this empty. This was on a Friday night, the lobby was packed, and I had to wait in line to buy tickets. But, no one but the GF and TGT wanted to watch this movie. The movie kinda sucked. I have no plans to see it ever again, but it wasn't as bad as some of the reviews I read, and it was nowhere near being bad enough to make me want to leave. I don't want to say "I didn't get it" because I think I got it, but there just wasn't much to get about the movie. The story was weak. The budget was obviously too little, at one point they are in the snow, you can hear the snow crunching, but none of the snow moves, and there are no footprints. Would I recommended you watch this movie? No. Is this movie as bad as Darren Arronofsky's first film, Pi? Hell no, I don't think I'll ever see another movies as bad as Pi.

HDTV

It's finally here, I have HD. My family has had a TV capable of High Definition for some time now, but as of yesterday we finally got a HD Digital Cable box and DVR. HD is ok, but I love the DVR. I never really was excited about this sort of thing, but now that I have it, it is fricking awesome. I was pausing TV last night, just 'cause. I've scheduled recording for 2 weeks from now, just 'cause. Now all I need is a Wii, and I'll be set. Let me record TV shows while I'm playing $5 20 year old video games. I love you technology.

Your Weekly Moment of Zen #?

Well there you have it. Look at the way the little one moves, kinda creepy.

Ghetto Prom Pictures

I saw this over at my favorite message board. It's the kind of thing you need to see to believe. Here is a little taste of what is to come. Ghetto Prom Pictures
























And don't accuse me of going all Kramer on you, there's some white folk on there as well.

next week

no moment of zen this week. sorry, i know how much you love my pointless and often humorless videos. think of the bright side, at least you wont need to ignore this week.

Happy Thanksgiving

I am so...










for some...

Water Damage.

Tuesday morning at about 2am a water main broke on the campus of my university flooding the library. I've got two fairly large papers coming up, and over 55,000 books have been damaged and are being sent out to be 'fixed'. Not only that, but every periodical and journal the school owns was in the basement, where there was over 7 feet of water. The entire children's collection was damaged, and all the micro-film is water logged. They didn't specify, but I'd guess close to 100 have been destroyed. The is currently no time frame for getting back into the library. The upper three floors are open, but they are computer labs and classrooms, only a small number of books are held here. I'm really out of luck when it comes times to write these papers. I was going to need the journals in the basement, but that ideas all wet. Shit, this sucks. I hope tuition doesn't go up.

Charity.

I may be a Scrooge when it comes to Christmas music in November, but I can respect this man. His name is Larry Stewart, and he has been handing out money to strangers for close to 30 years. It started as a large tip, and progressed to him giving away $5, $10, $20 $50 and $100 to people he thought looked like they needed it. To date he has given away about $1.3 million. This year alone he will give out more than $165,000 dollars to complete strangers in Chicago and Kansas City. However, he is weak from chemotherapy, and will be sending out trained Secret Santas in his place.

I don't have large amounts of money to give away to charity. Although I like to tell myself otherwise I am, in fact, in debt, but I don't want that to stop me. After reading the above linked story I went through my clothes and pulled out the ones I no longer need. The Salvation Army is closed for the weekend, but Monday I will be dropping off clothes for the needy. This isn't something I've never done before. I give clothes to the Salvation Army on a semi-regular basis, a couple times a year minimum. I know I don't give much, but I give some. Some of you reading this blog will probably read this and say I do too little, but thats wrong. Justing doing something is enough. If we all can give an extra large tip to downtrodden looking waitress, or buy a homeless man lunch, or donate some extra clothes to charity we will all be better off. You don't need to give out $100, all you need to do in make an effort.

At my limit.

I can tolerate the Christmas decorations in places like Wal-Mart and Target this early in the year, but does the radio need to play Christmas music on November 17? Granted it is my favorite Christmas song (also my favorite Springsteen song), Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band doing "Santa Clause is coming to Town," but it is still too early. I hate the way stores, and now radio stations, are jumping the gun by so much with Christmas. At least wait until after Thanksgiving.

You Weekly Moment of Zen #7

I imagine this real life Frogger action had the same effect on that intersection as the brown note would've.

Blog Action

There are approxamtly 100,000 new blogs created every day.

There are only about 4,000 blogs that are considered "blogging elite." Meaning they have at least 500 other blogs linking to them.

Heart Palpitations

Holy Crap. I thought I was going to have a heart attack last night. I was getting ready for bed, and had the scare of my life. I grabbed the cat, I like to bring him upstairs to sleep in my room, he wakes me up in the morning. After I put the cat down, I took off my cardigan and clogs, and went to take my pants off when I noticed something on my shoulder. I though a lock of my hair had fallen down so I brushed it aside, but after the hair moved it was still there. I turned my head as far as it goes and looked at my shoulder, and there was A FREAKING MOUSE ON MY SHOULDER. I have no idea where in the hell it came from, but at 2am it freaked the hell out of me. I knocked it off my shoulder and started to spin in circles. This all peaked the cats interest, luckily for the mouse he landed in my shoe and the cat didn't notice that. I took the mouse outside to set free, he was small, about the size of a Peep with its headed bitten off. I could have fit about 30 of them in my shoe, he was so small. When I came back inside, the cat was still sitting next to my bed, waiting for the mouse to show himself. The cat stayed there for a few I hours. In fact he was probably there until the sun came up. Anyway, the mouse scared the shit out of my last night.

You Weekly Moment of Zen #6

Wait for the end. I don't speak Finnish, but I can only guess what they're talking about in the car. The hand gesture almost makes it look like this sort of thing is routine.

Feelin' Lucky?

How'd you feel about spending $100 to get a 1 in 5000 chance at winning a $450,000 car? Now is your chance. A Mercedes-Benz dealership down in Maryland ordered an SLR for a customer last Christmas, but the buyer backed out. I think thats code for "wife said no." Anyway, his loss is our gain. The dealer is trying to recoup his losses by selling raffle tickets for this beast. For only $100 you will be sold 1 of 5000 tickets. I'm seriously thinking of buying one. It would be amazing to own one of these cars. So few are produced, and apparently even fewer are sold. Paris Hilton drives one, which could be scaring off potential buyers. V12, 0-60 in 3.8 seconds, 617 hp, top speed 207mph. Or you could just take a $300,000 alternate prize, which does make more sense. I don't know about states other than Connecticut, but here it would cost a fortune just to win it. Sales tax alone would be $27,000, then theres a gas guzzler tax, personal property taxes, and possibly gift taxes, that doesn't even insure it. I'm guessing minimal coverage would be at least $8-10,000, but probably higher. So just to drive it that first mile would cost you close to $100,000, if not more. I'll take the prize money please.

Pelican Swallows Pigeon

My earliest memories are of a trip to Key West when I was about 2, I remember two things. 1. Seeing Pelicans 2. A wind up SCUBA toy. Since then Pelicans have been my favorite avian creature. When I read this story I was psyched. Pelicans aren't suppose to eat pigeons, nor are they supposed to live in London, but thats beside the point. The coolest thing about it is, that big pouch the pelican has, you can see the pigeon flapping about.



Pelican catching pigeon.
Pelican Tries to swallow pigeon.

You Weekly Moment of Zen #5

The audio from this is from a real political ad in Wisconsin. I'm not sure if the video is official, but it works with the audio. This is quite possibly the greatest political advertisement ever, and by greatest I mean worst.

Vote for Ron!!

Sorry

I've been really busy this week with school, work and neutering my cat. I've barely had enough time to eat or sleep, never mind updating this blog. This weekend I'm going to catch up on some stuff, and hopefully be back in blogging form come Monday.

moment of zen coming later today.

Your Weekly Moment of Zen #4

This one goes out to all the ladies:

Powerball Update

Damnit, I'm 0 for 1. This is a waste of time... I give up.

Powerball

Today I bought my first ever lottery ticket. Powerball.

Lets hope I go 1 for 1.


Later I'll let you know how I do.

Hurray For Beer.

Thanks to National Geographic I've got the top 25 per capita Beer consumers for you.

1. Czech Republic------------------160.5*
2. Ireland---------------------------127.4
3. Germany-------------------------109.9
4. Austria---------------------------105.8
5. Belgium---------------------------98.6
6. United Kingdom-----------------95.7
7. Denmark-------------------------92.5
8. Slovakia--------------------------92.4
9. Australia-----------------------87.8
10.Venezuela---------------------83.3
11.United States------------------82.8
12.Spain-----------------------------82.1
13.Finland---------------------------81.7
14.Hungary-------------------------80.1
15.New Zealand------------------77.3
16.Netherlands
17.Poland
18.Portugal
19.Canada
20.Romania
21.Bulgaria
22.Russia
23.Switzerland
24.South Africa
25.Norway

Sorry for only having volumes for the top 15, but that is all Nat. Geo. gave out. And, in case you hadn't noticed, I bolded all non-European nations.

*All volume measured in liters per capita.

Your Weekly Moment of Zen #3

I can stand Honda, but I love this commercial.

As if the Kazahks didn't have enough problems.

First they get stuck with Borat, now the national bank of Kazahkstan has mispealled the word "bank" on their new currency. Apparently Borat hadn't done enough damage to the nation's image so they decided to let the government take over. And, it isn't just some of the money, it is about 80% of the currency printed for the year.

Just a Reminder

For some crazy reason, or because I fucked something up, my blog is best viewed on a Mac or PC running Firefox as the web browser.

If you haven't yet experienced FireFox go ahead an download it now, there is a box thing you can click over there ---> and down a little bit (or alot if your PC is messin' up my blog). Then you can see my blog, and the internet, the way it was meant to be seen... without MS's hand in pants... I mean business.

300 Million Americans

Tomorrow morning at about quarter till eight the US will reach the 300 million mark for population. We reached 100 million in 1915, 200 million in 1967, and are expected to reach 400 million by the year 2043.

I'm not entirely sure how they can be sure we'll reach 300 million at 7:46 am October 17th, but that's what they're saying. Anyway, in case you didn't realize this, the United States is already the third most populous nation on Earth, and now we'll be only the third nation with over 300 million people (but I suppose that is self explanatory).

Your Weekly Moment of Zen #2

This is only about 4 minutes longer than it needs to be.

Maine Rednecks

*Sorry for the delay in postings, my internet went down (again) this weekend.*

This past weekend I took my girlfriend up to Maine for the weekend. Being relatively new to the north she had yet to visit Maine, so we thought we'd make a weekend of it. You may be wondering why we would choose this weekend to visit Maine. Well I have two answers for you; 1) the October issue of National Geographic Traveler touts Maine's Fryeburg Fair as being a wondrous experience, 2) no woman (not even my girlfriend) can pass up outlet shopping, especially in a place like Freeport.

By God were we wrong. The Fryeburg Fair must have been one of the worst experiences of my life. The fair takes place hours from the nearest highway, in what amounts to be a residential area with only 2, maybe 3, small access roads. A 4:20 drive turned into a 7 hour drive because of more traffic than I've ever seen in my entire life, and in the northern reaches of New Hampshire of all places. Once I got into the fair it totally sucked. It was overly crowded. It looked more like a cheap carnival than a fair. And, worst of all, I had to finally admit to my girlfriend that northern rednecks/ white-trash, are in fact much much worse than anything she ever saw growing up in Atlanta, and then living in Alabama. I had and aunt that lived just south of Canada, in Vermont, and I do recall seeing numerous country folk, but never did I realize how back water some of these people are. I expect more from New Englanders. I don't think I've ever seen so many mullets in one place. And I know for a fact I haven't seen that many Insane Clown Posse, and Eminem t-shirts in one place since the late 90s, it ever. No wonder Canadians dislike Americans, we've stuck all our genetic rejects right on their border. One of the main selling points in the article was the amazing food, and specifically maple sugar cotton candy, at the fair. Wow, that sucked too. It tastes like normal cotton candy, although the ear of corn covered in maple syrup was pretty damn good.

The weekend wasn't all bad. We did stay in a fairly nice hotel, which was over an hour from Fryeburg, and Freeport was fun. I bought a kickass winter hat at the LL Bean factory store, and some new socks. The drive back to Connecticut was also fun, no traffic, only a few tolls, and the thought of never having to return to Fryeburg for so long as I shall live.

Metalocalypse

When I was an angry teenager I went through my heavy metal phase. Most guys do, but I grew out of it. Sure I have all of Metallica's albums, but so do alot of people. Anyway after years of repressing my metalheadness, Metaloclypse has brought it back out. It is a short featured on Adult Swin on Cartoon Network, and each episode is under 15 minutes long. This is hands down the best cartoon created since South Park. Don't believe me? Check out this episode for yourself (it's not my favorite episode, but the only one I could find in its entirty on YouTube).

Part One:


Part Two:


And for some reason the intro sequence was cut off of Part One, so here it is.

Your Weekly Moment of Zen

Hopefully this will be a new tradition here on The Guinness Tooth.

Beam Me Up Scotty

We haven't quite reached Star Trek levels of teleportation, but some scientists over in Copenhagen (a truly beautiful city, you should visit), have managed to teleport both light and matter about half a meter. Who knows how long it'll be before we can send people, or cows, any great distance, but it will happen. I know for a fact I will not be one of the first to use it. The last thing I want is to end up with my atomic structure scattered throughout the universe by some mistake in the calculations. Or even worse, end up like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly.

This is The Sex

The word for today is "Juxtaposition."
From the Merriam-Webster Online dictionary:
Pronunciation: "j&k-st&-p&-'zi-sh&n
Function: noun
Etymology: Latin juxta near + English position -- more at JOUST
: the act or an instance of placing two or more things side by side; also : the state of being so placed

Here's an example of poor use of Juxtaposition:

Why place such terrible music "side by side" with one of the most beautiful cars of the last...forever.

The Flaming Lips: 9/24/06 Hammerstein Ballroom

Sunday night I did something I’ve wanted to do for many years, be part of a Flaming Lips concert. Note the fact I said “be a part of” as opposed to simply “watching” or “going to” a Flaming Lips concert. This is because Wayne Coyne makes you, the audience member, feel like so much more than a simple concert go-er. He makes you feel like one of the regulars at a Flaming Lips house party. I have never seen a band-leader, or in his case a ring-leader, do such an amazing job of making every audience member feel like the only audience member. I simply cannot get over the fact that this band did what it did. Standing on stage, perhaps 20 feet away from me, Wayne has this ability to come across as the most likeable guy in rock n’ roll. He makes you think if you ran into him at random, that the two of you would be best friend for life. Before the concert even starts he is showing what a cool guy he is. He is up there on the side of the stage watching the entire set of the opening act, which is something I’ve never seen a musician do. Not only that, but he helps the roadies set up the equipment, a feat I’ve seen indie label bands avoid. Add that to the fact that the bend is such an excellent live band (something I didn’t expect), and you’ve got yourself a concert you’ll remember forever. That statement doesn’t even include the lasers, about 15 guys dressed like Santa Clause on stage left, an equal number of girls dressed up like “sexy aliens” on stage right, such vast quantities of streamers that the view of the stage was completely obstructed, a giant bubble Wayne used to walk and crawl across the audience, hand held smoke machines, an amazing collection of videos played on a screen behind the band, roadies dressed up like “superheroes” (Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Thor, The Flash, Space Ghost, Bat Girl) and about 100 giant yellow balloons bouncing like popcorn through the audience.

For a band that’s been playing since 1983 I was quite shocked to hear only two songs that predated 1999, those two being their biggest US hit, “She Don’t Use Jelly,” and a song Wayne didn’t think the band had ever preformed live before, Steven Drozd, the guitarist/ keyboardist, begged to differ, “You Have to be Joking (Autopsy of the Devil’s Brain),” off of Hit to Death in the Future Head. I have seen a couple of Flaming Lips set-lists, and it is rare they play anything pre-The Soft Bulletin, but I was hoping for old stuff, and I got it. The only thing that could have been better would have been in they played "Talkin' 'Bout the Smiling Deathporn Immortality Blues (Everyone Wants to Live Forever)," which is also off of Hit to Death in the Future Head, which I should mention is my second favorite Lips album (I won’t disclose my favorite, guess if you please), and therefore I’m biased towards songs from that album.

Anyway, the live aspect of their music made me realize what it is I have disliked in the two albums released after The Soft Bulletin, and that is they are too polished. The band is producing gloss when I want matte. Although Wayne has stated that the last three albums have all been products of the studio, it is only Yoshimi…and At War with the Mystics that feel like studio crafted albums. I feel as though I can’t fully describe what I’m trying to say without using vague terms such as “earthly,” “organic,” “live,” and “human,” to describe what they’re missing, so I won’t. However, all those terms were there when I saw the music performed live. At War with the Mystics could easily end up on my list of most disappointing albums of ’06, but the songs from that album were amazing live. Too often you see a band and think “damn that was a great song… on the album,” but not with these guys. (With sentences like that I feel as though I’m trying to sell the band, go ahead say it “The Guinness Tooth is a tool.”)

As you can see this isn’t your typical concert review, I didn’t tell you how long the set was, I didn’t tell you which songs they played, I didn’t even tell you to what effect the special effects were used, no, what I want to convey to you is the fact that The Flaming Lips do something no other major label band do. They connect with their audience, after 23 years, in the same way a bunch of teenagers in their first band try to. They have a true love for their craft, they want to create the most beautiful, the most sincere, the most spectacular concert possible. They want you to leave feeling like I felt. They want to be your best friend.

The Foot Guitarist

Do I know how to play guitar? Yes. Do I have arms? Yes. Does this guy know how to play Guitar? Yes. Does he have arms? NO! Check out this guy play guitar with his feet. Amazing.

Here's a link, the person who uploaded it on the YourTube disabled the embed function, but you need to watch it.

The Big E

Some for the delay, It's been difficult getting back into the swing of school, work and the real world.

Up until Saturday I'd never been. Every year people encourage me to go visit New England's largest fair, but it took me this long to visit. I don't see the point. There weren't enough animals there. When I go to fairs I like to look at freakishly large cows and swine, and I got neither. There were some normal sized cows, but now swine of any shape, size or variety. The food was over priced. I spent $6 on a small serving of the world worst fried green tomatoes. I know many of my readers hail from the northeast, and like my self probably aren't that familiar with this delicacy of the south. But, you need to know it is an amazingly light and refreshing food when prepared properly. My Atlanta born girlfriend, being a child of the south, has turned me on to this and many other southern foods. She has also shown me the correct way to prepare it, which is a lesson the people of the fair should pay attention too.

It wasn't all bad news. The Maine exhibit was delicious. I had a tasty lobster roll, and some smoked salmon on a stick that was to die for. There was also a GM exhibit of an old GM Futureliner. I also bought some tasty pickles from a booth in the Connecticut exhibit. They're spicy sliced pickles from a place in Fairfield called Mels' Hellish Relish.

Overall I had a good time at the fair. I plan upon going to another fair in October. This one is up in Maine and was featured near the back of the most recent issue of National Geographic Traveler. Apparently it's got some giant Oxen and Cows. And cotton candy made from maple syrup.

A final note. I had no idea there were so many "cowboys" in New England. I've always known Connecticut to be the least New Englandy of the New England States, but I had no idea cowboys and farmer folk were so prevalent. There's just something strange about a guy from Massachusetts wearing a cowboy hat, with super tight Wranglers, big boots, a giant belt buckle and a Carhartt jacket.

Today is my first day back in classes, I've been dreading this day for, uh, um, days?. I thought I had to go back to school this past Tuesday, I got ready, and then at the last minute saw I was scheduled to return today. I had spent Monday trying to get the most out of summer, in anticipation of my return to school. I went to Six Flags Over New England. My trip to Six Flags had one, and only one, purpose, to ride The Typhoon. A water roller-coaster. It was 75 degrees out, and because my lovely girlfriend wanted to go on this one ride, we made the trek to Six Flags to go to the water park! Don't get me wrong, I too wanted to go to Six Flags, but a water park in 75 degree weather is not fun. But, The Typhoon was fun, so we rode it twice. I nearly chiped a tooth from my teeth chattering.

In other news:
If you recall I had some issues trying to get tickets for Sunday's Flaming Lips concert in Boston. After Ticketmaste refused to sell me tickets because I didn't have an AmEx card, and then offered crappy seats I decided to skip the show. I've never seen the Lips, and really wanted to go, so I broke down and bought some tickets on ebay. It was too late for Boston, so I got tickets for the NYC show, through ebay. Two tickets for $104 (including shiping and insurance), which is less than what two tickets for Boston would have cost me via Ticketbastard. The best thing about it, is that the tix are GA on the floor. Thats better than anything I could've gotten for Boston. My girlfriend is happy to go, aside from the possibility of being surrounded by dirty hippies. If you've been a long time reader of my blog, or atleast since late June, you'll know I hate hippies. She fears being crowded in a small place with dirty people, regardless of thier hippie-ness, hippies just tend to be extra dirty.

Speaking of Hippies, I've think I may be starting to look like one. I'll be like one of those Self-Loathing-Jews, except I'll be a Self-Loathing-Hippy. Long hair (pulled up in a bun), and a scruffy beard, and Birkenstocks, all year, even in the winter.

more animals news (mostly good)

I didn't mention this earlier, because I wasn't sure if we were going to keep them, but I got 2 cats recently. They, a male and female (litter mates), showed up at my house about 10 days ago, and have been here since. They're young cats, the vet estimated them to be about 10 months old, and they're house cats. Because we didn't find any "missing cats" flyers around, and because no one claims to have lost cats in my area, we assume they've been abandoned. They are really great cats, and knew to use the litter box immediately (which just proved they were abandoned). The male was bitten on his left hip, so I took him to the vet for shots and anti-biotic's, the female will be checked out next week. I've never had cats before so this is really cool. Until I get them cleaned up and they have all their shots they have to stay in the basement/ garage, so they're biding their time out of sight for now, but soon they will arise from the depths to join the family. We've named the female Snowball, because she is white, and the male The Shadow because he is grayish silver or silvery gray, I'm not sure which one. I'll post pictures in the next few days.

In other animal news some sicko left a dead squirrel in my front yard Friday afternoon. I was leaving my house and saw a white towel balled up in my yard, and paid it no attention. About 40 minutes later my mom called me to tell me there was a dead squirrel in that balled up towel. I don't know if the person that put the squirrel killed it, put it in the towel and dumped it in my yard, or put it in the towel, killed it and dumped it in my yard; but I do know that neither one of those actions sound very wholesome to me. I really hope the squirrel was dead before it ended up in the towel. Binding an animal and then killing it, is just plain perverted. I hope whoever did that gets whets coming to them.